For the past 3 relationships that I had, I always commit the same mistakes..in every relationship it seems that I'm not learning the lessons that are really common in every relationship that I had. I do sometimes reason out that "Im only human, I do commit mistakes". But I am wrong... I am human I really do mistakes...but I also have God that always get hurt everytime I commit mistakes and also hurt that He is seeing me having a broken heart.
In every relationship that I had, I always setting up my standards and limitations...everything seems perfect at first. But after few months everything is becoming a mess. There are arguments and me left crying. And eventually will end up in break ups...
In every break ups I end up asking myself a lot of questions like: "What is it this time?", "naging imature na naman ba ako?", "am I being selfish?" and a lot more...
Even though I was able to answer those questions...still the past relationships were not successful. And that brings me back to ask God after my 3rd and last relationship 3 years ago.
I got soooo many amazing answer that He can only give me.
I John 4: 19
God’s love is the source of all human love. It is not natural for man to love God. We love Him because He first loved us.
He lead me back in loving Him more than the man that I am with. The reason why those relationships are not successful was I was too focused on how to keep my partner rather than focusing on how both of us will grow our relationship with Him and let Him be the author of our life.
After 2 years of bitterness and hatred because of the pain that caused me. The Lord helped me (as He always did) to make me whole once again. He helped me to be better or even the best future wife for my future husband. The heart that once was broken in a million pieces is now whole and I let God hold it for me and let Him hold the pen that once was mine. I let Him write my love story...I know He is now writing a beautiful tale for me that will lead me to a "happily ever after" ending because He is the one writing my love story and I know He wants to write the BEST love story for me.
I still commit mistakes...but in every mistakes there is the wisdom of the Lord and His loving arms that carry me and His unconditional love that never fails to forgive me. But this time in every mistake that I made there is the learning not to commit the same mistake again (and do it all over again)
I'm still waiting for the love of my life, my prince, my groom...I know he's just here wandering the earth and waiting for me...
I've been always praying for him that the Lord also teaching Him the things that I'm also learning as I'm running my race to glorify God. I know the Lord has the perfect plan on when and how we will meet...He is always telling me these things: "PATIENCE MY CHILD....PATIENCE".
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